Bazaar Bananas
by Caz251
Summary: Summary: All he’d wanted to do was visit an Ancient souk; he never wanted any trouble with the Judoon. General spoilers for New!Who Series 1,2 & 3. Written for the story lottery challenge. Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who.


**Title:** Bazaar Bananas  
**Author:** caz251  
**Fandom: **Doctor Who  
**Characters:** 10thDoctor, OMC!  
**Genre: **humour  
**Rating: **PG  
**Prompt:** 16 story_lottery a souk  
**Summary:** All he'd wanted to do was visit an Ancient souk; he never wanted any trouble with the Judoon.  
**Spoilers: **General spoilers for New!Who Series 1,2 & 3  
**Word Count:** 1160  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Doctor Who, no matter how much I wish it were so.

He had wanted to see about the history of his own world, he'd wanted to learn about Middle Eastern countries in history, and the Doctor had agreed to take him on a visit. He had definitely not expected to be wandering through an alien souk, an Ancient Earthen souk maybe, but definitely not one off Earth. He knew that he should never have trusted the Doctor, the man was absolutely useless at arriving in the right place at the right time.

The man had opened the TARDIS doors and walked off out into the bazaar leaving him to closed the doors and follow after him. It took him a few minutes to realise that something was wrong, many of those surrounding him looking like perfectly normal human beings. When he saw the bipedal rhinos in leather he knew that he couldn't be on Earth. A walking rhino wearing leather wasn't an everyday occurrence, but nobody in the bazaar seemed phased.

He caught up with the Doctor to point out his mistake, only to find the man deeply engrossed in a conversation about an object that looked like an element from a kettle. The conversation was very emotive and interesting to the Doctor, from what he could make out of the conversation anyway. The way that the Doctor was using his hands to gesture was terrifying, he could take someone's eye out with his wild gesticulations.

Then everything went wrong, one minute he was watching the Doctor in his avid conversation, and the next the other man had grabbed his arm and was directing him to run. He had no idea what had happened it was a complete one eighty, and he had no idea why. The only thing he really did know was that he had no idea why he was running through an alien marketplace with his alien travelling partner being chased by rhinos in leather. It was surreal, and definitely not what he had expected when he had woken up that morning. He'd wanted a fun day trawling an Arabian souk for interesting items, although this was interesting it was not an experience he relished.

He tried to run back in the direction of the TARDIS but the Doctor protested vehemently, stating that it was too risky, he didn't want the Judoon getting their hands on her. What Judoon are he had no idea, but if he were to take a guess he'd say the rhinos in skirts. Looking franticly over his shoulder he realised that they were gaining on them, and that there was nothing they could do about it, people were moving out of the rhino's way, but no-one would make a path for them.

"We need to get out of the marketplace." The Doctor yelled to him as they ran, he then ducked between two stalls and carried on running along another section of the market, heading towards what looked like the town or a village of some sort.

He didn't speak, instead conserving his energy as he ran after the Doctor, he was so glad that he had chosen to wear sensible shoes for running, there is no way he'd have managed this in his normal boots. They weaved in amongst more people, both alien and human by the looks of it, the space rhinos still chasing them. They had been shouting after them a lot of things he wasn't sure of even with the TARDIS's translation circuits, until he suddenly heard them speak in English.

He listened to what they were calling as he ran, unwilling to stop and see what would happen when they caught them, he was sure that he'd be scared of rhinos for life, the looks on their faces didn't promise anything but a harsh punishment. What that punishment was for he had no idea, he didn't know what the Doctor was up to, and he certainly knew nothing about any Class Alpha substance. He felt a hand on his arm and the Doctor pulled him into a stone building, it appeared to be a temple of some kind, before he pushed him down onto one of the mats. "Take a minute and catch your breath, the Judoon can't enter here, it's a sanctuary." The Doctor spoke.

He looked up at the other man; he had no idea what he had done, but he had to find out why they were being chased by the rhinos. "What is a Class Alpha Substance, Doctor?"

The Doctor looked at him sharply, "Where'd you hear that?"

"The Rhinos, they were trying to detain us over a class alpha substance, what is it?" He replied, a little worried by the look on the Doctor's face.

"Drugs. Narcotics. Illegal drugs." He answered before muttering to himself that he wasn't carrying any Class Alpha substances, well not any that were classed as Class Alpha in that galaxy anyway.

The Doctor had just started to come out of his muttering when a young woman, blue with a hint of lilac about her features appeared next to him. "I heard you, do you have any?"

They both stared at her, taking note of her eyes, wide with thick yellow lines leading away from her irises. "I'm sorry." The Doctor started, "I have no idea what you are talking about." He tried to placate her, in a way the woman scared him, the look in her eyes reminded him of drug addicts going through withdrawal, which if she thought he was carrying a class alpha substance and wanted it she probably was.

"Liar." She screeched at him. "I can smell it. She hissed before reaching forward and started rifling through his pockets until she found what she had been looking for. He tried to stop her, knowing that there were many things in his pockets that could change history, but was unsuccessful. She pulled back a few minutes later looking triumphant, the source of all the problems in her hands.

He looked at the Doctor a look of amusement on his face, "A banana. We were being chased because of a banana."

The Doctor just looked shocked, as if it was impossible for bananas to be illegal, either that or the fact that the woman had had the nerve to rifle through his pockets, steal his banana, then eat it in front of him. He let out a small laugh as a thought came to him, "I'm glad you directed us away from the TARDIS Doctor, they might have taken it away as contraband, after all bananas normally come in a box."

It may not have been an Ancient Earthen souk, but by the end of the day he could definitely say that he had had an experience. He knew he shouldn't laugh, but he couldn't wait to meet up with one of the Doctor's other companions, it would be a great story to tell. The Doctor – an Intergalactic Drug Dealer – wanted by the Judoon for dealing bananas.


End file.
